Tough Customer // Wire

It’s Elephant’s

It's Elephant's

There’s a program on the History Channel called “Modern Marvels.” It’s what they show in between the Hitler documentaries and all that footage of airplanes from WWII. Generally speaking, episodes of “Modern Marvels” focus on incredible feats of science or engineering - things like the combustion engine or the world’s tallest skyscraper. It’s what you would call edu-tainment ; informative enough that you might watch it in one of your GE history classes, but with the kind of sensationalized footage and booming voice overs that catch the attention of pot heads flipping through the channels late at night.

It’s also great to watch when you’re folding your laundry or doing any other menial task that only requires part of your attention. Which is how I came upon what might be the strangest episode yet. The modern marvel profiled wasn’t radar or the cure for polio. It was ice cream. The channel devoted to momentous achievements in the history of mankind was giving over an hour of its time to a popular frozen dessert, and in doing so was declaring ice cream to be a modern marvel.

The ten minutes of the program that I watched were full of mundane information on subjects ranging from the amount of ice cream eaten by the average American (23 gallons per year) to the disputed origins of the ice cream sundae. Then, right before going to commercial, they threw out an ice cream fact that caught my attention: the most popular ice cream flavor in the whole country is vanilla. Not rocky road, not mint chip, not even cookies and cream (although that did make the top five). Despite the near infinite amount of flavor choices presented by today’s ice cream market, the majority of people prefer the one flavor that is also used as a synonym for boring, soulless and tame. Vanilla.

Which is actually not really a diss to vanilla. What this says to me is that despite all of the other freaky ice cream flavors out there, with their brownie batter swirls and their candy-coated peanut butter filled pretzels, people always come back to the basics. Sure, that other stuff sounds delicious. And for a pint or two it probably is. But if you’re going to be trapped in a bomb shelter or or otherwise locked away with a limited selection of dessert choices, you’re going to go with a time tested member of the ice cream triumvirate: chocolate, strawberry, or good ol’ vanilla.

Now I’m not going to say that Atlanta’s It’s Elephant’s (yes, all those apostrophes are supposed to be there) are the vanilla ice cream of rock n roll. That would be an insult, despite the fact that I just acknowledged vanilla’s enduring quality. Besides, I think the Jonas Brothers are the reigning kings of vanilla rock right now. But It’s Elephant’s are definitely working with some classic flavors, albeit with a little kick. Let’s call it strawberry chocolate, which everybody knows is delicious, cool and sexy - in a Billy Dee Williams sort of way.

It’s Elephant’s works in the new tradition of southern rock, dipping in the same well as bands like The Whigs, Trances Arc and, most directly, Kings Of Leon. The guitars and drums lock together on fuzzy riffs and back porch stompers. Singer Brent Jay’s vocals sound like someone screaming hippie gospel from the back of a crowded bar room. It’s a style that Chris Robinson used when he was trying to sound like Rod Stewart, which often came off as over-wrought and derivative. Fortunately, singers like Jay and KOL’s Caleb Followill have toned it down and hipped it up, adding rhythm and strut in place of the extraneous “oohs” “ahhhs” and “baby baby babys.”

It’s not a game changing sound, but it’s not a flash in the pan either. This is good, solid rock n roll. A classic flavor. A modern marvel, if you will.

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