
For the first time in forever my inbox is down to less than 100 unread messages. Getting it below 500 took the better part of three days. What’s crazy is not that there is so much crap out there – anybody who has spent more than ten minutes looking at the internet knows that the world is full of dumb shit – but rather that out of 500+ promo emails that I’ve gotten over the past few months, there were less than 20 post-worthy submissions.
I know I have some pretty high standards and all, but come on. Some of y’all need to give up the dream and resign yourselves to the fact that you are not, nor will you ever be, good at making music. It’s getting to the point where I get so much bad music sent to me that I’m going to have to create a separate sub-section of this site for the sole purpose of talking shit.
But until that happens, I’ll keep up my tireless effort to bring you the wheat that remains once I have clicked delete on all the digital chaff. To wit, here are 14 pretty sweet jamz. Some of them are from as far back as March. Some of them just came in yesterday. They’re all fresh though.
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MP3: ‘Sexy, No?’ (Iretsu)
Post-indie rock from the Pacific Northwest with a little more cock in its walk than you might expect from that part of the world. Kind of a Menomena-meets-Interpol-type thing with well placed highlights on the rhythm section.
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MP3: ‘Standing Stones’ (The Devil Whale)
This song sounds like somebody from 1999 got in a time machine, went back to 1965 and recorded music for us to listen to in 2011.
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MP3: ‘Fragile Bird’ (City and Colour)
Gritty, macabre indie rock. The video makes me think the song is about some kind of junkie necrophiliac nightmare, but mostly I just like the guitar sound.
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MP3: ‘We Are Not Cool’ (Stripmall Architecture)
First of all, that’s a cool band name. Secondly, this song is sex on a platter.
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MP3: ‘Free Go Lily’ (Ponchos)
Do you remember that scene in Men In Black II where Will Smith and Biz Markie use beat-boxing to communicate with the aliens? Well, if any super mellow outer space creatures ever visit Earth in real life, I feel like this would be the jam they use to tell us all to chill out.
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MP3: ‘Bits & Bytes’ (Fuel Box)
I wanted to hate this because here in the US, this is the kind of music made by bourgeois white kids who use their parents’ money to buy fancy computers and co-opt black culture. But you know what? These guys are from the Netherlands and don’t know anything about that. They just like to get down.
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MP3: ‘Swift Way On’ (Minden)
Despite the horribly clumsy drum track, this song still boasts enough slick pop goodness to make the cut. It’s the perfect soundtrack for seducing one of those shy girls who doesn’t smoke, drink or use swear words.
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MP3: ‘Knives So Sharp’ (One Trick Pony)
Well put together folk pop from a band that seems to relate strongly to the American consumer. I may be way off here, but I feel like these guys all get together with their guitars and a copy of the business section from the Sunday NY Times and write songs about David Segal’s bi-weekly column.
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MP3: ‘Guillotine’ (Death Grips)
I’m way past being an angry teenager, but part of me still loves listening to music that I know would just scare the shit out of my parents.
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MP3: ‘Paul Blart & the Death of Art’ (Herzog)
Overtly intellectual slacker rock that reminds me of the feeling of superiority I had about my own tastes in music back when I was in high school.
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MP3: ‘I Was Thinking’ (Gauntlet Hair)
I think it was Sasha-Frere Jones who wrote the New Yorker article about how indie rock had forsaken the dance beat. But then all those indie rock kids got samplers, learned how to use Reason and started making songs like this.
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MP3: ‘Chicago’ (The Downer Party)
My friend Dave used to be the drummer for Red Wire Black Wire, but he had to quit the band so he could move to Chicago and get his Ph.D. in physics. Every once in a while I will get a message from him saying something like, “working with advanced Li compounds to create better storage options for clean energy” or “ last week I helped one of my professors with a nanotube experiment on the international space station.” Dave is one of the coolest people I know.
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MP3: ‘Lament For Morning’ (Raleigh Moncrief)
At the risk of repeating myself, let me just say that I love it when somebody comes out with something that wouldn’t have been a classifiable form of music 50 years ago. And I’m especially tickled when baby boomers are all, “The Beatles are the only good thing that ever happened to music,” and then indie musicians and producers like Raleigh Moncrief are all, “Sorry grandpa, I didn’t hear you. I was too busy using my futuristic recording technology to shift the paradigm. Just let me finish up here and I’ll show you how email works. Again.”
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MP3: ‘Come Home’ (Chappo)
Promo material is, as a general rule, loaded with hyperbole and false statements. I usually skip right past it, knowing that the music itself will paint a clearer picture than any over-caffeinated, under-paid PR intern ever could. That said, I feel it’s worth mentioning this one came with a press release that used the expression “super-gnar sexual overtones” and a video of a topless fat guy eating a spray painted watermelon on what was supposed to be an unknown alien planet.
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